Diary of a Fungi: Preparing for Ceremony Continue to article
It’s the Rugby World Cup final tonight. Here I am outside the ceremony hall, half the world away from Paris, on the Southernmost tip of Africa, preparing to do a hero’s dose. Crazy to think, since I love rugby. But I knew months ago, long before I knew the date of the World Cup final, that it was time to go into the ceremony. Resistance has been a part of my preparation for sure, as it is for so many. Sometimes, really all the time, you need to trust the synchronicities in life.
What does it take to prepare for a 5-gram magic mushroom dose? A hero’s dose. If it’s all the way down here in Africa, I’m sure it’s all around the world. And if you’re reading this, you may have asked the question yourself. How do I prepare? What’s the diet? How strict must I be? What does resistance mean? What should I tell my friends I’m doing? What about spirituality? We’ll cover that and more in the first person here in this article.
Before you take this article as medical advice, it’s not. This is meant for entertainment purposes. And if anything you read here speaks to you, that's great. If you’re an adult, you’re welcome to do the adult thing and manage your decisions for yourself.
Where possible, always have an experienced guide. I’ll share what the facilitator spoke to us a week ago.
“Good afternoon, beautiful souls. I hope that you are all well and looking forward to this weekend. I'm super excited to be journeying with you all … It's going to be very special … The journey has already begun and everything that you've been doing up until this point is beautiful. Not to worry if your preparation has been a bit patchy till now. For the coming week, however, the more you put in, the more you get out.
So, please, first of all, just make sure that you have read through all the essential information. Make sure that you have everything that you need to bring with you. Make sure that you have that sorted before Saturday morning so you're not running around like a crazy person trying to get everything together on Saturday. And give yourself as much time this week in nature as you can, if you can get to the forest and get into the sea, please do. And as much time in silence and with yourself as you can, as much time in contemplation. And yeah, just to purify more of your experiences this week. It’s not just about the diet, obviously removing as many toxins as you can from your diet is great, but also from what you're watching, and what you're engaging with, try to avoid excessive social engagement, excessive watching of TV and Netflix, that kind of thing.
Just allowing more and more spaciousness for things to begin to come through, for things to process. And also know that everything is for you. So if this week you're not able to take that time in nature and work suddenly gets really busy or family things come up, then it's also part of the journey starting, and that it's probably stuff that's coming up to be cleared and to be dealt with before you're going into the journey and that's also all okay. Just having that awareness that the journey has begun and that this is your preparation and that you are going to go on a beautiful and deep adventure this weekend and keeping them in your consciousness.
That is the best preparation that you can have. It's also really, really usual at this point in the journey, preparation to kind of start doubting your decision and wondering why on earth you thought this was a good idea and to clarify that that is totally normal. Your body is also super clever. It can even start to do things like give you little colds or bring physical ailments up to try and avoid going into the ceremony and just to allow the body to express itself, give it love, give yourself compassion, and know that again it's all part of this process. And our egos, bless them, the little beautiful things that we need and want to individuate us and make and help us to survive in this world, they get a little bit afraid and they think, oh my goodness, I'm going to be lost forever.
You can just reassure them that they will be back online by Sunday morning, all in working order. They just get to have a little bit of a holiday on Saturday night to allow us to go deeper into the connection with the unseen and the unconscious realms, and ultimately it's going to be helpful for the whole and for the ego. So, bless you all. If you have any questions or concerns, please don't hesitate to send me a voice note or to give me a call. I'm here and I'm sending you all lots of love and happy preparation. I look forward to seeing you on Saturday.”
We truly are blessed to have an incredible facilitator. So I started with the diet - well, because I wanna. I’m big into physical health. And so that’s usually where I start.
Except for the past 3 months; I haven’t been physically healthy. Let me paint a picture. Nothing majorly wrong, mind you, just the small things, the daily habits have been off. I have been drinking a lot of coffee, 3 or more cups a day on a regular basis. I’ve been smoking … a lot! Sometimes 20 a day. And I’m not even a smoker. And it goes beyond the food. TV series .. woah. Sometimes it has felt like the characters I’ve been watching on TV are closer to me than the real people in my life. The small things add up to not a great picture.
If you’re honest with yourself reading this, you know you’ve been here. Taking in too many toxins in your life in general. You might be doing that right now. I was in a rut.
So the prescribed diet for ceremony preparation says, over time, as I built up to the ceremony, I removed toxins from my diet, layer by layer. The things I used to lean on to self-soothe instead of dealing with my stuff, were slowly but surely removed.
I devised a plan over the course of the past weeks to remove caffeine, tobacco, TV series, sugar, salt, meat, snacking, alcohol, and a few other things. And the truth is, now, at this moment, I don’t miss them.
I get it. You might read the ceremony prep and it will tell you to cleanse your system and prepare your chakras and spiritual guides or whatever. And whatever works. I just want to acknowledge that at this moment it feels great to be free in my body, for the most part, of external influence. Clean and clear. Do you know what I mean? Like being a newborn again. Close to it. Ah … this is me. This actually feels good. Sure, I’ll go back to enjoying these things, hopefully not all of them. But even then, I’ll still have this moment where I was clean and clear and I can remember knowing that I truly do not need them. There is a lot of value in that already.
The effects of bad habits impact far deeper and longer than one would think. Check out Atomic Habits by James Clear for the science behind this concept. The concept, as I understand it, is that you become the sum of your long-term habits. So it’s important to shake your habits up once in a while to see what really works for you long term.
And having a ceremony as a deadline provided accountability and motivation. Sort of like getting into powerful physical shape if you’re a rugby player going to the World Cup.
The mental prep
This is a little less prescribed but no less important.
It’s advised to think of your intentions before going into the ceremony. Why am I doing this? What has guided me here? And look for the signs.
Resistance will come. That’s part of it.
For me, I started off the mental journey thinking I would need a break from work. You see, I've made a mental decision to really focus on work. And toughen up my mindset in life. But I don’t want to lose touch with my softness and my spirituality. So it made sense that’s what this is for me.
And part of me wants to know the answer and part of me wants to just let it all go.
I went for a walk with a friend a week ago and she asked why I was doing the ceremony. I told her about the softness I desire and she asked me what I would do to ensure I cultivated a softness in the preparation. Great question. So important to be open to these kinds of conversations. So the past week I’ve been doing a lot of stretching, getting to bed early, being gentle with myself, letting go of conflict when it comes up, and working with a foam roller on my body. And this morning, despite a really busy work week, I woke up feeling like I’d been on a two-week island holiday. Soft and gentle and relaxed. It felt great. F*$k, thank goodness - like I said, it’s been an intense week.
And that was part of the resistance. I’m not gonna be ready. Plus it’s the Rugby World Cup. The world is too stressful right now. These have been the kinds of thoughts I’ve contended with this week. And you know what, sometimes you just have to trust and let go of resistance when it comes up. And I think that’s especially true of ceremony prep.
Perhaps it’s a mental lesson, a mental reference, too. My intentions have shifted since I started. Next year I want to level up. I want to dream bigger. And this ceremony prep has already shown me that I can handle more than I thought and still come back to a gentle place.
You see - whatever comes up - the value of this journey is far greater than just the ceremony itself.
I had such a great call with my Mom today. She wished me a good journey and we shared our love for each other and laughed about the World Cup final and the timing. I sent love to my brother too. I feel really supported by friends, family, and community.
The first time I went into a ceremony I kept it pretty hush hush. Just my nearest and dearest. Now I’m chatting to friends, family, and acquaintances. I have boundaries of course. At work, my colleagues know I’m going into the ceremony but don’t know what I will be taking. For some reason, I don’t feel comfortable sharing it with work colleagues just yet.
It’s not even that I’ve done a lot of these. This will be my second Hero’s dose journey and I’ve done two other plant Medicine journeys too.
It helps to be able to share this with friends and family. This is the first time I’m blogging about my journey. I’ve written a lot and researched a lot about Psilocybin since joining the Mushly family and, I must be honest, it feels so great to know so much more about the science of Psilocybin. Check out the rest of this blog, it’s good stuff. And I’m grateful to be able to share this journey with you, the reader.
There are 9 people in this ceremony. We’re in a quiet estate with beautiful decor and well-cut grass. The lead facilitator catches up with a few of the guests. The space will be held by two facilitators who have years of experience. We’ve all signed indemnity forms. We all know what we’re getting into. There is a very clear and present spiritual presence. Music will be channeled live all night. Each of us will lie in our single cots, eyes closed, internal, for most of the journey.
This is our reward. The psilocybin journey is the reward for all this prep. I can’t wait.
I do acknowledge that these journeys can also be hard. And I'm sure that one of these days I’m gonna have a hard journey. But you know what, this prep has shown me I can handle it.
So in conclusion, do the prep.
Mindfully, intentionally, courageously.